waiting.....again

For the past couple of months, I’ve been plagued with sometimes nagging, but often crippling upper back pain.

Of course, I worry that this may be caused by my myeloma returning so after seeing my haematologist I was referred for a CT scan.

I popped along to my local hospital yesterday morning for the scan which was all done in the blink of an eye and now have to wait 10 days for the results. I think I’ve posted before that it’s this waiting that is the worst.

I am prepared for my myeloma to return.  It’s inevitable so it would be stupid of me to not be.  I’m not worried by its return either.  I know I can deal with whatever comes my way.

But it’s not knowing that ekes away at me.

if you have a mac, you'll know what this means.....


I’m fairly sure that the pain is caused by my use of walking aids (I use a frame or sticks) putting extra stress on my shoulders and upper back.  But I’m also aware that I had myeloma lesions all over my spine when I was diagnosed three and a half years ago.

I’m also mindful that my stem cell transplant is past its "sell by date" and am in the zone for relapse.  As I said, I’m not worried by that but again it’s all this waiting for things to be confirmed one way or another.

Anyway, onwards and upwards.  Well sideways.  

Slowly!

Comments

  1. I hear ya'! It's the sitting around, waiting, doing nothing that makes you feel helpless. I have my fingers (and toes and arms and legs) crossed for you and am sending all my healing vibes your way!

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